we found quite a few pictures that correspond with what i'm writing about, so now i've been busy scanning about 100 photos of my mom. not the way i knew her. nope, these almost seem like a different person. a young girl laughing with her friends. living in the times she was born to. living, for the most part, the way she was expected to.
this project has done things for me that i did not expect. i find myself thinking about her. a lot. wondering about her. trying to rationalize this portrait she has painted of the young innocent girl with the woman i knew as my mother. it's been both eye-opening and challenging. she was a good girl - both in the image created by her own hand and in that which i have of her. rarely stepping outside the box of expectation and seemingly content to be there.
so am i my mother's daughter?? i have often stepped outside the box (as any of my family members can attest to) and continue to do so. i so much prefer a boxless life. but i often wonder where this tendency came from. i do not see it in my ancestors, so maybe it is just the times and culture i grew up in. the sixties were like that, yet i feel it goes deeper. that even if i had grown up in a different era i would have had trouble conforming.
|(my paternal grandfather's family)|
so i guess i'm glad that i'm living in this day and age and in this country, where we have the freedom to step outside of our boxes without experiencing dire consequences. and i'm also so very, very glad that my mother took the time to document pieces of herself that i would have had no other way of knowing. so,so special.